Time flies when your having fun

Where do I begin. Sometimes I am really bad at blogging aren't I? Jackson is changing everyday and its hard to believe just how far he has come. He finally sits all by himself with no assistance. Sometimes he is a little wobble man but that is due to him being really excited about something. We are formula free which I was total nervous about switching to milk but Jackson has almost doubled his liquid intake so that's wonderful! Which leads me into the great news of......NO GTUBE FOR 14 DAYS!!!!!!!! I have been overwhelmed with excitement because I thought the gtube would be part of our daily feeding lives until Jackson was at least two. No Jackson had other plans for himself. He was and is a determined little boy. This now means two things, feeding therapy is being discharged and fine motor skills will be the main focus and we wait four months for the gtube to be removed. That's all I can think of at the moment so I will leave it at that. Next time I will have a ton of summer pictures! Thanks for reading!

What would it be like

Today I have been thinking what it would be like if I had carried Jackson full term. Would things be any different for me? Well of course the obvious stands out that I wouldn't have a son that doesn't require such special attention. I can almost bet that I would be working full time at a place I hated and didn't respect me or my ideas. I wouldn't be living in my parents home looking like some sort of a bum. I may have even started back in school. I wouldn't feel like I have aged ten years.

I  find myself in a rut every once and a while. I like to talk a great game that everything is so easy but sometimes its not. I sometimes get angry when I see babies that are the same age as Jackson doing so much more than him. Maybe its not even anger but its more jealous. Jealous that he works so much harder. That at the end of the day I am excited if Jackson eats four pieces of soft carrots and a half a jar of peaches. That is two scoots across the floor makes me tear up. Yes I am very proud of my son and I don't ever want to take away from all the progress he has made.

So today is a bummer day and I wish it wasn't. However writing about it makes it better.

Lazy Saturdays

Not much has been going on with Mr. Jackson lately which is a relief to say the least. His physical therapy has been a slow and steady progress and I am so grateful for his therapist Lisa because she pushes Jackson even when he feels like giving up. He now sits unassisted for about 5-10 seconds and tummy time is a breeze now. He is starting to roll around the house and just starting to scoot very slowly. Feeding has started to become a struggle because Jackson now doesn't like anything with thickness to it. However he loves to eat soft carrots, potatoes and his favorite is tapioca pudding. I have a feeling everything will just be a slow progress with Jackson. He does everything on his own time.
We went to his hearing doctor yesterday and has his hearing tested. The hearing loss is still there but it hasn't gotten any worse so that is a relief. Until next time!

Sweet Alice

Today my niece, Alice was brought into the world at 11:45am, weighing 5.8lbs and 18 inches long. Its a strange thing....pregnancy. At least for me it is. This past year I have watched people have babies and watched in amazement how beautiful it is to see babies be carried full term. I must admit I spent most of the time feeling so jealous that I couldn't provide that for Jackson.(that is for another blog) I remember when Mandi, my sister-in-law turned 24 weeks and I thought to myself, that little girl in there looks like a real baby. That is when my sweet boy began life. Mandi and I have a very sisterly bond and yes sometimes we haven't always agreed on everything but like sisters we care and love each other. I've known Mandi since she was in middle school. I have seen this little girl turn into a mommy and it is such a precious thing. I have been to weekly ultrasounds and sat in waiting rooms for hours just to make sure everything was okay with Alice and Mandi. I have been worried sick that my niece would come into this world too soon. I have babbled Mandi's head off with things she will need when Alice gets home. So to finalize I am soooo glad my niece came into this world safe and healthy. I love her tons and I can't wait to spoil her! 

Alice Jean Laverne and her FAVORITE Aunt Kristi 

So HOT

This weather has made it nearly impossible to even step outside to enjoy the sun. Yesterday is hit 104 degrees and today it is up to 103 degrees. So we have been just hanging in the house enjoying the nice cool air. Jackson has FINALLY started a crawl. Now before we get excited it is a very slow crawl. Its kind of amazing to watch my son do things that in the beginning of his life we thought may never be possible. So yay to Jackson! I am sure there is more that I could write about but honestly the heat has me too tired to do it. So I'll leave you with some pictures.

One Year Old

Sweet Jackson

so serious

How could you not love this face?

One Year Check Up

Jackson is an amazing little boy. I know I say that almost every post but he seriously is the coolest kid. For instance rolling from his back to belly has been a total nightmare. An hour after his physical therapist left last Friday(his birthday) he started to do it and has been on a roll ever since. That is not say we don't have a long  road ahead but were making it.

His one year check up was this past Tuesday. He weighs 20lbs 3 ozs and is 28 1/4 inches long. He is still on the charts for his actual age and finally hit the charts for his height. His lungs sound great and we will continue to use his Pulmicort breathing treatments until he is at least fifteen months old. After that the doctor will decide if we need to take him off completely or taper him off  at a slow pace. I am personally hoping for a slow taper just to make sure we don't rock the boat to quickly. He is developmentally behind about six months and while that sounds super awful it is actually pretty typical for a 24 weeker. At least that is what everyone keeps telling me. Oh and lastly he received four shots and he was such a good boy. He was mad for the first five minutes and then he was fine. So proud of my big boy!

Have a great weekend! Happy Fathers Day to all the Daddys out there!!!!

1 year

Plain and simple

HAPPY FIRST BIRTHDAY JACKSON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love you more then words can ever explain. I hope your birthday is as amazing as you. 

Love, Mommy 

One year in pictures( read as a story)

June 7, 2011- I held you close in my tummy.

June 8, 2011- You came in this world at 4:29am 1.14 ozs and 12 1/2 inches long. My world stopped, God has given me the most precious boy. 

You laid tiny inside your incubator hooked up to wires and a ventilator

but I knew you were amazing and would fight with everything you had. 

The nurses said my touch was very important to you.

So you would know I was fighting with you.

Sometimes you didn't always like what we did to you but you were a trooper.

You did get a little tired and had to go back on the ventilator

and with a little help finally came off and did amazing.

We sat many long hours sitting, rocking, reading and singing. 

While you grew every day ounce by ounce.

You were my tiny fighter who just kept trucking along.

You got tired of being in the incubator and you screamed, " Let me out!!!"

So we let you out and I gave you a bath. 

 We enjoyed special family time and

 and just mommy and baby time. 

Feeding you for the first time was so scary 

but it juiced you up!( actually on steroids)

You watched football with Daddy

and stared at mommy 

You slept

hung out

and just grew

so we could finally

BRING YOU HOME ( October 14, 2011)

You loved it at home and

got to celebrate your very First Halloween.

Your Big brother helped to rock you to sleep

but you were wide awake for Thanksgiving.

However you slept for Santa. 

Your first walk was incredible and it was so nice to be in the fresh air.

You didn't like your first taste of food and only got one spoonful in.

Sometimes you were sick but

you always bounce back. Especially to watch the Cats play!

You always have a big smile on your face

and nothing bothers you.

The Easter bunny was good to you this year.

You were sad when mommy said no to candy. 

You enjoy your little friends

and make Daddy 

and Mommy so proud of who you are.

You are so curious about what life has to offer

and look forward to enjoying life to the fullest.

So here is a farewell to your stat monitor and all your oxygen. To being a micro-preemie and fighting all the odds stacked against you. Here is to being one!!!!

You are such an amazing little man that has changed my life in countless ways. Thank you for fighting and never giving up! Thank you for choosing me as your mommy! 

Happy First Birthday Jackson!!!!